Fatal Attraction

2007-07-15T13:11:00.000+08:00

put me down.
put me down.
why dont you people just kill me instead?

i could never get anything right.
i could never live up to expectations.
i could never succeed in EVERY FUCKING aspect of my life.

its hard to be so close to someone.
yet being compared to that person.
wishing you were that person.

2007-07-12T12:21:00.001+08:00

i had your blog song on repeat for the entire morning....

2007-06-23T16:58:00.000+08:00

I hate the sun.
Probably one of the reason why my poor dying plant is dropping its leaves.
Being cooped up in the dark, airless room all day long.
Even the weed starts to rot.

2007-06-08T23:39:00.001+08:00

I have been so busy lately that I can only take some time off now to write a long due entry. I know how much you hate cartoons, but after my persistent pleas and threats, you really did watch it with me! It was Monday when we caught Shrek 3 together, but I'm still feeling so damn happy about it now. I LOVE THE CUTE DRONKEYS. I LOVE THE CUTE DRONKEYS. I LOVE THE CUTE DRONKEYS.

But I love my baby more. (:

2007-06-06T23:46:00.000+08:00

Such a fucking loser. I get really excited whenever I finish one piece of homework.
Can't wait to Saturday night out with the girls! ((((((((((((:

2007-06-01T21:45:00.000+08:00

Sometimes I just don't feel like speaking, and sometimes I am just being me. You just called me your emo girl, and you didn't get mad at me. And now I'm feeling all sad and miserable, I can't remember the last time I missed someone this bad. My boo has taken the cake.

Training was sad. Never did I expect that I'll feel for coach, but I truly am gonna miss him.
Still being the antisocial and I still don't feel the desire to dine with the team. I don't like to conform to "tradition" but maybe one day when I get to know everybody better...

2007-05-29T23:23:00.000+08:00

I am gonna kiss you to death if you don't call me in the next half hour.

Why Do You See Right Through Me?

2007-05-07T19:59:00.000+08:00

Finally, I am only 5 days away from the Othello play at NYJC. Which means 120 hours till I see you again, Beh Jia Qi! Don't screw up the production okay, dear? Considering the blur girl you are. :p

Alanmanda Chen, you're not forgotten, even though we hardly have the time to meet up. Please, please call me when you end school early? So we can meet up for dinner or something k? Miss you so!

And to Shi Wan and Jasmine, I love you girls a lot, a lot, A LOT! ((:

2007-05-04T21:55:00.000+08:00

Fuck you.
Just when I thought you're becoming more understanding.

2007-05-03T23:12:00.000+08:00

Friday. Is. Finally. Here.
New, bright sports bra!

And to Elaine, Shuqun and David:
ALL THE BEST FOR THE DEBATE TOMORROW MAN!
Although you guys would probably not read my blog.

2007-05-01T11:12:00.000+08:00

So, so strange.

07A01!

2007-04-22T11:20:00.000+08:00

I love my class!
We're a bunch of happening people put together in a happening class. With a few nuts who really crack me up. (:

I saw a shooting star in the sky of peejay during movie marathon night! It was darn pretty. I hereby conclude that I've got an item off my list of 4821270341 Things To Do Before I Die.

Have I told you how much I love my class?

2007-04-16T22:37:00.000+08:00

I WANT TO SLEEP.
I DON'T WANT TO DO MY HOMEWORK.
I WANT TO WAKE UP AS ANGELINA JOLIE IN THE MORNING.

2007-04-15T00:34:00.000+08:00

You feel like giving up.
And accept it all as it is.
Can't find the way to change,
Can't find the strength to try.
You feel like giving up.
The words of a selfish bitch.

2007-04-12T22:58:00.000+08:00

All the negativity that I felt towards you over the years, it all befell on myself that night.
The lies that were told, the pride that you held on to.
Why did I push you away so cruelly?
Why did you even allow me to hate you?

Didn't feel like attending Chinese today because we are fucking doing on family relationships currently, and I am really afraid that I will break down in class. I'm crying every single day. I know crying doesn't change any shit about the situation, but i just want to feel so fucking tired in school everyday. So I won't have the energy to think about anything.

Dearest Boyfriend

2007-04-06T20:13:00.000+08:00

L ove was never meant to sail on through
E ven the strongest may bow to its twists and turns
T hrough it all we must survive
T rust in us that we can too
E veryone doubted our love, but
R ight by you is where I stand
T ill death do us part
O nly then will I leave your side
E very moment spent in thoughts of you
R ule my heart, my king
N ever ever suspect me of treason
E verlasting loyalty that I have for you
S tress not, my love
T rue to you I will always be.

A sonnet for my baby. (:

The Crack Of Dawn

2007-04-01T09:01:00.000+08:00

I woke up at the crack of dawn
Hoping to go for my morning jaunt
Around the tracks with my Nike on
But oh no!
'Twas packed with pink and green
No way I could go on in
With the Great Workout happening.

Oh well. I guess I need some time before I can write proficiently. I hope.

"Life is more than grades."

But grades are what that can bring you places, or none at all. Like what Mr Dennis Yeo said during assembly, I need to die die get into a local university, or not go to one at all. Fuck it. I shall not let my confidence depend on scores and grades! It's time I understand my strengths, acknowledge my weaknesses and admit that no one is perfect. Still, I have to finish the horrible amount of homework that I have for the weekend. I didn't even go for my greatgrandma's death anniversary. Sigh. My site is getting really boring. All I talk about now is how scared I am of retaining...

I have a burning desire to drop by baby's to see his adorable sleepy face and cuddle him to sleep in this cool morning. Tata!

Colorgenics

2007-03-31T18:54:00.000+08:00

You are trying desperately to prove yourself. You are going at it hammer and tongs in order to get your own way. You oppose any sort of restriction or opposition to your own point of view in the belief that this could prove you how self determined you are.

You are a true extrovert, frivolous and outgoing. You need to feel in control of any situation. If matters are not proceeding according to plan you tend to get extremely irritable and perhaps become difficult to live with.

Your involvements seldom measure up to your high emotional expectations and your 'needs' to be 'loved' and 'cared for' have in the past often led to extreme disappointment. But a change is in the wind - make a firm decision to start anew. Just 'think' it..and it will happen.

For whatever the reason, you find it extremely difficult to sustain relationships - that is to sustain them in the manner that you would wish. You are a very gentle sort of person, full of feeling, sensitivity and susceptible to love and affection, looking and longing for a partner with whom you can enjoy 'All things bright and beautiful' - someone with whom you can seek out the more esoteric things of life. But up to now this person has only existed in your imagination. You are very choosy, appreciative, refined and extremely artistic in temperament and it is your hope to seek others who will allow you to form and express your own taste and judgement and who at the same time may assist you in your intellectual or artistic growth.

Perhaps in the distant past your trust and belief in your fellow man was misplaced and you can now no longer accept anything as it appears to be. You are untrusting and you insist that before you commit yourself to anything, you examine the pro's and con's with critical discrimination. The situation has now progressed to one where you are apt to disagree yet not make any form of constructive criticism to every suggestion that may be put to you. As a result you are in limbo. There is a saying that goes 'The past does not equal tomorrow'. Think about it - and let go.

HERE

Thanks, Darling

2007-03-31T18:17:00.000+08:00

Treat me well
Treat me good
Treat me like you always should

Hold me close
Hold me tight
Hold me, thrill me, kiss me good

Above is my bad attempt at writing poetry. Well, at least I think it is a poem. Incomplete and very erratic.
It's only 3 weeks of school, and I can foresee my future as a retainee.

Ill

2007-03-25T21:51:00.000+08:00

I can feel my abs forming from my constant coughing.

Hate it even more that now I've got a perfect excuse to skip school, I can't. Because I'm lagging wayyy behind everybody else. Damn.

Playing The Cards Of Fate

2007-03-20T20:16:00.000+08:00

So lessons started, and friendships made. Oh, how fate plays a part in each and every one's life. I got to know Yvonne better, and really, she's a nice girl. A lesson to learn from this would be how foolishly immature I was during my lower secondary school days, and that what we hear from others may not be true at all. I got my fair bit of bad reputation in her eyes too, but hey. I'm glad that everything's cool now. (:

Had my first Literature lecture in 2 years, and although I am a little afraid, I can see myself enjoying lit in the days to come. I love reading!
Economics is rather tough though.

My first training on Saturday!

2007-03-15T23:22:00.000+08:00

Not every day can be a total 'ten' -- after all, if every day were a great day, you would take them for granted. Today you should aim for a 'five' -- and chances are, you'll be delighted when the day upgrades to a 'seven.' When this day hits a sour note, you can get all bummed out about it -- or you can be grateful that things aren't worse than they are. Sure, it's a simple form of hopeful optimism, but it's a smart way to look at things.

On another note, the desire to go to school has deserted me all of a sudden. I'm kinda back to having a flexible relationship with school now. But still! I shall bravely state here that I am not going to skip school for this whole year. Without a very valid reason, that is.

Somebody save me from myself.

Tsk!

2007-03-13T21:16:00.000+08:00

So close, yet so far.
Missing to death, yet nothing much to say.

I've said it so many times in a day, that those three words seem to have lost the very meaning that I wish to convey. Is this it? Is there no other stronger word for it? Tsk. Who can blame me? When the period comes, along with it is the roller coaster ride of mood swings. Aiyoh. I just miss you dearly, dear!

Tomorrow I shall prove my worth, show that I can do the things I want. When I set my mind and heart on reaching that goal. Don't fail me, Chua Min Yi. And enjoy yourself at chalet after having fun at trials. Sheesh. I love talking to myself.

Hello. I miss you.
Are you thinking of me too?

PMS

2007-03-13T00:05:00.000+08:00

Stay beside me.
Don't ever leave.

Pioneer!

2007-03-12T00:10:00.000+08:00

This is my attempt to write about orientation for Alanmanda Chen ZhiYu. And it is not gonna be easy for me because I rarely even write about the events of any day, and now I have to write about 4 days. Walau. Damn hard.

The first day was fucking boring. Subject talks. Talks. Talks. And more talks. And I sucked at learning the mass dance. Which Ernest conveniently danced with this MGS girl in his OG, while I had to dance with a girl. I am jealous.

We had station games on the second day. Damn fun. I got really dirty and wet crawling on my tummy across the field and putting my face into a plate of flour. I did a lot of other things too lah. But they're a little insignificant to write about. Tell you during chalet!

Had this leadership training camp for the third day with my uncle as the facilitator of my OG, which was QUITE weird. I nearly died during the free fall (we had to fall on our back while standing on two tables onto the hands of your OG mates) which I nearly landed on my ass cuz' the guy who was supposed to support my butt was talking and not catching me when I fall. Super scary! Trembled like fuck. Had to run around the hall and start conversations with people you don't know. Saw this girl who looks like Zhiqi. >.<

Campfire for the last night. Things got really fun and high! Played, cheered and danced! And my clan won the most united title. Maybe because everyone was as slow as me as we didn't run away when the burning torch rolled towards our direction. And I know a lot of SUPER lame jokes from my friend. Can't wait to tell you all of them!

It's damn hard to put everything into words lah. Can't wait to see you during chalet! (:

2007-03-07T21:18:00.000+08:00

Baby, i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love youi love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you i love you...

Compromise.

2007-03-05T14:50:00.000+08:00

Give and take.
Take and give.
Something that we need to learn: how to compromise our differences.

I strongly believe that we should never let the day's anger and resentment be carried forward to the next. Instead, ponder over why you ticked, and what did you do that caused you to bring hurt to your significant other. And what's ponder without actions? Try to keep everything in mind and be more sensitive in dealing with matters of the heart. We all get hurt. No matter how strong we may appear to be.

Baby, I'm sorry too.

Ugly Is The New Beautiful?

2007-03-02T18:47:00.000+08:00

Siannnnnn.
I hate my hair.
I hate my hair.
I hate my hair.
I hate my hair.

You make me feel much, much better.

Make You Smile

2007-03-02T02:06:00.000+08:00

I couldn't feel you, you're always so far away.

If I could, I'd only want to make you smile.

Sometimes, I hate myself. I really do hate myself. Especially on nights like this when I am feeling so fucking lousy. Will I ever stop crying over myself? Stop behaving like I am such a failure. And start believing that there's some good in me too. That I can be as perfect as them too.

Reassure me. Make the demons of my heart go away. Make them disappear. Hold me tight. Keep me safe. Tell me that I'm beautiful. Show me that I am important to you.

Love me.

I want you to be happy. Just by being with me.

Bittersweet Nostalgia

2007-02-26T23:06:00.000+08:00

I miss Alanmanda Chen.
I miss Jesselyn Toh.
I miss Beh Jia Qi.

It's just so hard to pretend that we're still close friends. But I still want to believe.
Don't let go.

Anticipation

2007-02-25T13:33:00.000+08:00

As much as how I miss going back to school, I think I need to get my head back on the ground. How can I be so sure that PJ is going to be as fun as what I expect, or even, how can I be so definite that I'm going there? Who knows, maybe my choices will turn around and bite me back.

I can't believe that it's all over after anticipating the arrival of Thursday since... last Friday. It was a weekend well spent with my boo.

2007-02-22T14:05:00.000+08:00

CLICK: http://www.tinkebell.com/manual

THIS WORLD IS FUCKED.

Can't Deny

2007-02-21T12:53:00.000+08:00

It'll be hard if I see you guys around when school starts. It'll be nearly impossible to build up the friendship once again, and we'll most probably just remain as the hi-bye friends we are now. But I cannot deny that warm feeling inside when I read that you guys chose PJ too. Can't help feeling that maybe, just that tiny speck of hope, that we'll be back to what we once were..

So Fly

2007-02-19T01:18:00.000+08:00

Hey baby hey baby hey.
How did you get me so fly?

Be My Love

2007-02-15T01:57:00.000+08:00

Saying 'I Love You' in every language and tongue on earth still isn't enough to show how deeply I feel for you. Ups and downs, my feelings have yet changed. I just wanna stick with you for now. For all the days to come. For always.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY. <3

Emo!

2007-02-12T20:29:00.000+08:00

You'll be safe here. says:
paper 5 is interesting wat
You'll be safe here. says:
sounds emo
You'll be safe here. says:
suits you la

HAHAHAHAHA.

The Reason Is You

2007-02-12T01:14:00.000+08:00

I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you.

The song that always have that special effect over me.
Listen to the lyric of the song, baby.
You're all I ever want.
You're my reason.
This is for you.

Untitled

2007-02-11T02:52:00.000+08:00

Satisfactory disappointment.

Didn't do up to my expectations, but didn't do that badly either.
PJC only offers ONE subject combination which I can take. That is without Math as a H2 subject. Damn, makes me feel damn sian for being such a nut at Math. Oh welllllllllll.

Insecurities towards every part of my life.

Thank God It's Friday?

2007-02-09T07:04:00.000+08:00

Not this time.

I'm beat.
To a point of exhaustion that no amount of sleep can make me feel better.
i miss my sister. my protective figure. my comfort. my saviour.
but today comes the day when i'll have to face everything alone.

Esteem

2007-02-09T01:00:00.000+08:00

From now on, I am gonna love myself more and more each day.
Self confidence, girl.

Putting my thoughts into words will never be justified. The hard part lies in the representation. How many times have I said something, and lost the truest essence of what I feel.
oobuoyevoli

2007-02-08T01:35:00.000+08:00

IN TOO MUCH PAIN TO SLEEP.
AND MY BABY IS IN DREAMLAND THUS I CANT CALL TO WHINE.
PAINFUL AGONY.

Screwed

2007-02-07T11:38:00.000+08:00

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE
let my sister's theory of my dreams come true.
9+2=11
9-2=7

Stupid People

2007-02-06T00:24:00.000+08:00

I can't stand stupid people.

Bitching about people viewing your friendster account is so last century. In fact, I don't even remember it being history. Yeah, so what if I viewed your account? So what if I was doing it for a friend? You're insane for going around in school telling everyone that I viewed your account. And don't you dare bitch about my friend, you bitch. Wake up, you're not that hot. We have absolutely no interest in you or whatsoever and so forth.

Time to act your age, honey. (Which, I remind, is eight-fucking-teen; so stop being such a Primary 2 living in the world of mild bitch fights and quarrels of "I don't friend you anymore!") But hey, I guess I left quite an impression on you. Girls are the most vicious creatures on the planet. No shit about that.

I Miss You!

2007-02-05T01:21:00.000+08:00

I love that girl, but she loves my boobs.
Not that I have any, as it shows so clearly in the picture.

<3!

Bitter

2007-02-04T01:13:00.000+08:00

I got humiliated on the bus today, which I probably deserved for being such a cheat. But can't blame me what! I'm a poor student without a job and have absolutely no financial means of my own to spend 10 bucks on transportation fees everyday. Stuck in a dead-end job, having to chauffeur people around into the wee hours of the night, guess it's inevitable that you're such a bitter guy.

I am feeling bitter too.

Chemistry

2007-02-02T11:52:00.000+08:00

Damn. I can no longer check my horoscope before stepping out of the house anymore. It has already been a routine for me, and now Friendster decides to update it only in the late afternoon. Hate it.

Oh, how all of us are blinded by love when things are going well, only to find that actually his/her cute mole on the face totally isn't cute, or that habit of wearing that rusty brown sandals wherever (s)he goes just aint cool no more. Love is the highest level of Chemistry that all of us have learn. You mix the wrong chemicals together, and ba-ba BOOOM. But you learn something new after every failed experiment, and try to perfect that potion. Shouldn't that be the way? Instead of finding all the flaws that you once overlooked, or even fell in love with, why not see things from the other side? Maybe you aren't that perfect either.

I am late for my long overdue birthday treat, but what I read this morning just cracked me up.
Don't worry baby, I am still very much mesmerized by you. <3

Perfection

2007-02-01T21:25:00.000+08:00

I am an addict.

Three cheers for ouou! I'm done watching the last episode available for Prison Break season 2, and I'm starting on Desperate Housewives now. Such a TV junkie. Or maybe I'm just a junkie for good plots, great casts, and a whole lot of irresistables.

Life at home has been quite peaceful these few days. The lesser the amount of words exchanged, the happier I feel. Maybe I have found my own little perfection in this cracking home.

Fragile

2007-01-31T01:03:00.000+08:00

Friendships being fragile.
Relationships being fragile.
We are fragile.

Once broken, considered flawed.

Cry Just To Know That You're Alive

2007-01-29T00:20:00.001+08:00

I'll never let you go

So, never let me go

I will be your journey

And you will be my road

Down the stormy path

Love will never come to pass

It will be an anchor

Although the winds may blow

Won't let you fall

Fall out of love

'Cause together we'll be holding on

'Cause all we have is us

Won't let you go

Go away again

Because life don't mean nothing at all

If I don't have your love

Holding on to me, I see myself breaking down in front of you. Wished I didn't hold back, hoped that I wasn't so afraid. Maybe one day I will be brave enough to cry in front of you. Let you in on the darkest secret of my life; one that I've kept with me since I realized my position in it.

"I will always be here for you."

It melted my heart when you said that, and it is melting me as I am writing this right now. How can I ever see myself without you now, after all that you've said and done for me. I find myself becoming dependent on you, because I like that warm feeling you give me, the security I feel, and the way your hands naturally find mine to prevent me from falling. Like you do, I really cherish this relationship so baby, I won't let you fall... Fall out of love.

Technology

2007-01-27T14:55:00.000+08:00

So me and my dad have recently upgraded ourselves technology-wise. We no longer exchange any words, but SMSes instead. He seriouslyyyy needs to control that temper of his, and learn the very fundamental fact that WE DO NOT HAVE TO DO THINGS HIS WAY ALL THE TIME. Stop trying to cheat your own blood too, cuz' I'm older and smarter now.

And baby, you know why you fall sick all the time? Cuz' you're always not taking good care of yourself. Raining must bring umbrella! Sick must see doctor and drink plenty of fluids! Tsk tsk. Be guai and listen to me till you get better okay? Love you lots.

For All Time

2007-01-26T19:46:00.000+08:00

Liefde.
And I miss you so.

Get well soon baby. ):

Dreams Are Opposites Of Reality?

2007-01-25T15:32:00.000+08:00

I cried over a dream today. Like showing me how it would feel like when it comes. Getting me prepared. So it won't fucking hurts so much.

Birthdays

2007-01-25T00:05:00.000+08:00

No longer mean anything much to me.

It's just another day, the same routine, the same old me. Old. I don't even feel 17 at all. Cuz' I'm not out of age yet and I still have a year to go before I can buy my own alcohol. So being 17 is like being stuck in between innocence and noxiousness. Not such a big deal.

Thanks baby for everything. Short and sweet. You're the best present I can possibly dream of. And to my ladies, what more can I possibly ask for when I've got you girls beside me through these years?

I love.

Employed

2007-01-23T01:08:00.000+08:00

I am doing what I hate. Calling up people, asking if they want to sell their property and getting my dignity slammed all the time. Feels as though I have to pray and beg that they'd be interested every time I hear the dial tone. Hello? The names you people have are disgustingly hard to pronounce, so please at least listen to what I have to say before slamming the god damn phone. Can't believe I'm saying this, but I realised how nice China women are today. They've got a sweeter voice and they listen to my bad grasp of the language politely. Oh. I. Hate. Working.

I am damn tired.
Miss my boy. ):

Your Guardian Angel

2007-01-20T00:05:00.000+08:00

When I see your smile
Tears run down my face I can't replace
And now that I'm strong I have figured out
How this world turns cold and it breaks through my soul
And I know I'll find deep inside me I can be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

It's okay. It's okay. It's okay.
Seasons are changing
And waves are crashing
And stars are falling all for us
Days grow longer and nights grow shorter
I can show you I'll be the one

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

Cuz you're my, you're my, my, my true love, my whole heart
Please don't throw that away
Cuz I'm here for you
Please don't walk away and
Please tell me you'll stay, stay

Use me as you will
Pull my strings just for a thrill
And I know I'll be okay
Though my skies are turning gray

I will never let you fall
I'll stand up with you forever
I'll be there for you through it all
Even if saving you sends me to heaven

The sweetest song.

Deals

2007-01-19T23:05:00.000+08:00

ME: Get me that shirt for my birthday. It's only 10 bucks.
A: I'll sell you at 5. And I'll throw in nice birthday well wishes on your big day.
ME: Deal.

I love making birthday deals. The one and only month of the year when I can order people around, and get what I want on my day. HAHAHA. I sound like a total brat, but heck. At least I'm stating the stuffs I hope to get and I do not make ridiculous wants either. I am not expecting people to find me the lost city of Atlantis, so really, I'm easily satisfied. (:

5 more days to my birthday and getting my naval pierced! Courtesy of my dear sister.

Full House

2007-01-18T01:30:00.000+08:00

We cry because we know it's impossible to find it in reality.

Run

2007-01-15T21:09:00.000+08:00

I swear I could have died today at 6PM. And then everybody will cry at my funeral, not because they miss me, but because I am such a lousy piece of shit who didn't know her limits. And they'd cry in hopelessness for the girl who ran and died.

After living 2 years of my life not doing any forms of exercise, I decided to go running around the neighbourhood today. I should have stick to the usual (obviously 2 years back) routine of running in circles around the stadium. At least I could get to rest a little in the stadium and have access to water! God. I practically died on the way back home.

Damn, I'm such a lousy piece of shit.

Lovesick

2007-01-14T00:58:00.000+08:00

You're the dear boy of my lovesick mind.

Even though I hate it when you fall asleep because I can't bear to wake you up when you look so adorable with your two front teeth visible, just like a little black rabbit. Even though I hate it even more that you're so awake right now, while being a total sleepyhead when I'm around. Even though you're such a compulsive gamer who cannot sleep without playing at least a game or two. Even though you put me to the back of your head while you concentrate on your PS2.

And even though of all those mentioned above, I am still very, very much in love with you. Giving me the warmth I desire, and make my fucking fucking fucking cramps feel so much better.

<3

2007-01-11T10:37:00.000+08:00

One of your most cherished relationships is shifting into a lower gear, but that should not cause you any concern whatsoever. This is just a phase that the two of you are going through -- that you have to go through before you can get closer. Maybe you both need to explore life apart, or maybe you both need to learn how to cherish something you were starting to take for granted. Whatever the reason, go off on your own for a while and enjoy the perspective that solitude offers.

So freaky.

Lockets

2007-01-09T11:42:00.000+08:00

If anyone knows where I can find such beautiful heart lockets, PLEASE TELL ME!!

Cherish

2007-01-08T23:32:00.000+08:00

Cher·ish (chěr'ĭsh)
1. To treat with affection and tenderness; hold dear: cherish one's family; fine rugs that are cherished by their owners.
2. To keep fondly in mind; entertain: cherish a memory.

Just slightly over an hour spent together, and the feelings came rushing back. I am still, and forever will be, so in love with you. Am beginning to see the 'light at the end of the tunnel'; I am starting to cope quite well with the physical distance between us, but I guess I am still very emotionally attached to you! After we parted, I went back to the interchange to look for you for no particular sensible reason, just knowing that I really want to see you again. A case of when your heart takes control over your mind. Even though it proved to be a futile trip as I saw you board the bus, I was contented. Crazy me.

Had a threesome conversation with Alan and Jess, and it was rather heartwarming that I still got them!!! Busy with our own lives, we hardly got to talk for the past few weeks. I guess I just don't like how relationships change friendships, even though I understand completely and is doing the same thing too. Anyway, me and my ladies are gonna start work together soon! Just us three only! Having the time of our lives just basking in each other's company, while our significant others are busy schooling/working. Hopefully. So Jesselyn baby, I shall wait for your call tomorrow! Fucking praying for the good news!

Words

2007-01-08T11:21:00.000+08:00

Should've said something, but I've said it enough.
By the way, my words were faded.
Rather waste some time with you.

Words are just merely words. Over used and abused by all of us. But still, I want to hear them, and let them surround me with their magic, bewitching me, taking me higher. If what I say are just merely words, then let them be burnt up in ashes. But if these words are truly from my heart showcasing the burden, hunger and thirst in my soul for more of you, then turn them into solid pure gold that lasts for all of eternity and that can not be melted.

The same words repeated over and over again will soon lose its meaning. But that's all I ever want to say. That's all that my heart wishes to convey. I. Miss. You.

Cold

2007-01-08T00:34:00.000+08:00

I like warmth.
And I am awfully afraid of the cold.

Planned to crash PJ with Jesselyn today, but oh well. Save myself the trouble and the bad mood I will have from having to wake up at 0530. Guess my ATM card is more important, just in case someone comes along and withdraws the remaining $14 in my bank account. It's been a month since I lost it, so it's really time I go cancel it.

I don't quite like the coolness about you,
But I know you're just concern about me, and not overreacting.

I Miss You

2007-01-07T00:59:00.000+08:00

Baby, I was really sad when night came, but when you held my hand tightly, the warmth from your hands spread across my whole body, embracing me, keeping me safe in the dark, cold night.

The words just won't come out. And when they did, they didn't come out quite right. Yes, I was nearly in tears when I thought of it all. You said I was being silly, without having me to tell you just exactly how I felt then. You saw right through me. And that really comforted me.

I've thought about it; I am really being so silly to feel that way. With my mind cleared, I am starting to see this 'barrier' in a new light: it is not that scary after all. It isn't strong enough to stand between us, and I won't let it either. Being so silly will only make matters worse, so I am going to come to terms with the new phase in life, but never allowing my love for you to diminish any one bit. (:

I love you so.

Barrier

2007-01-06T14:19:00.000+08:00

I know there's no way that I can bypass this barrier in our relationship, so I just need to learn how to cope with it. Coping with the distance.

We all need some time alone once in a while. And because of the commitment to school, I am always looking forward with such zest to that one day of the week when I can meet my baby. Distance sure makes the heart fonder.

Distance sure is hard to get used to.
Promise we won't drift apart?

Horoscope

2007-01-05T20:12:00.000+08:00

AQUARIUS WOMAN

If you are in love with a woman in this zodiac be prepared to be very happy or be very sorry. She is a very busy person with her own matters similar to a guy in this zodiac. She is able to live by herself without any guy in her life, a very strong person indeed. Not because she does not have a dream guy, but if she cannot find such a person, so what. Because she thinks she can do anything that a man can do. She is a leader , a real confident type.

She likes to do things by herself, such as serving herself, opening the door herself. Because she thinks waiting for a helping hand is a waste of time, and she is not patient enough to wait around for that. If she starts to ask you out, do not think she is starting to flirt with you, but because she thinks it is a waste of time to wait for you to be the one who asked.

She likes a cool guy who sometimes act like he is ignoring her, so he has a chance to show her his own confidence. She like to guess her man's reaction, but at the same time she likes to have many men wanting her. She is a daring type who could just do things differently from other people in her same society. She dares to fight for what she thinks belongs to her.

Even if she acts confidently, she mostly feel lonely and alone. If she breaks up with someone, she won't show any emotion even if deep down inside she's feeling pain and agony. Not for long she will be back to the cheery and merry person again, because she looks at the world positively and has "Faith" in the word "Love".

She has more men friends than women friends, so do not be a jealous type if you date her. She could be slightly jealous, but she hates a jealous guy. She loves "Freedom" so before and after marriage , her freedom has to be the same. She likes you to trust her, even if she does not trust you.

She likes to be the one who is "Right", so if you argue with her, let her win if it is not a big deal for you in that subject. She is a straight forward type, so if she does not love you anymore, she will just tell you straight to your face. Her love and relationship are always real, so if she say "It's over" be prepare to leave, she is not testing you.

She is not a vulnerable type, so do not have to worry about her, she will survive by herself. If she is with you when you get sick, she will certainly take care and look after you, even if looking after you means a "small loan".

Do not keep secrets from her, she hates it and can really piss her badly. When she is sad, be understanding. When she is happy, be happy with her, she likes that.You will not get bored with this type of girl. Someone who is close to her will know that deep down beneath that confident and cold hearted person, she is just as fragile as any woman. She is a fun and talkative person and she likes to tease you. Do not let her talk alone, if you do she will leave.

She has many types of jobs because she believes what a man can do, I can do. If you want her to work for you, forget it. When she is in love, she will just leave her job in the day time just to come to see you, but not for long she will go back to work seriously again. Be prepared to live and love with a "Working Woman" then you will be okay.

If she mad, find a shelter, for the "Hurricane" is here! Her bad temper will last very shortly though. She is not a revengeful type and will not think of "pay back" time. Most people might think of her as "one of a guy", but in fact she is a 100% woman. She is easily hurt, so be nice with her. If she really loves you, then you are lucky because she is an honest, truthful and will never bore you. Understand that sometimes she will be over confident and sometimes like to have power or act bossy.

GEMINI MAN

A man in this Zodiac has a thin long and proportional face. He has a high forehead and is very clever. He looks like he cannot stand or sit still; a very fast person. His nose is just right in size, thin lips,talk fast and very talkative. He can think faster than he talks, but once he starts talking, he will talk non stop as if god has gifted him with that special talk machine mouth. He likes to cut his hair short and he is very athletic.

He is a tall, slim and every movement of his is "Fast" or nearly called "Hyperactive". He has a long fingers and is always tapping on table or moving his finger as if he is trying to grab something. He is the type who will write or scribble on paper, he never stays still. His hair always well combed or neat.

He will spent a long time to comb his hair. He will keep his manicure and pedicure clean. He is a well dressed and clean guy, so if you like cleanliness,you will love him.He will keep all his clothes in a big closet, and never throw away even shirts he will never wear any more, but yet he still keeps buying new clothes and make sure he is in style. He knows how to dress well even with a low budget. He get bored easily with his favorite clothes, cologne. He is very picky, so soap and his cologne have to be in the same trend or same scent.

If you date this kind of guy, you might think you are dating 2 guys, you will have to guess his feelings and emotions. Is he doing thing because it is a duty, or is it because he wants to? He changes his mind as fast as he change a new pairs of shoes. He can pick up a book and roughly read through and understand its content, so if you see a Gemini man who reads the whole book, then he must be influenced by other Zodiac.

He hates to set fix schedules, and dislike the same boring routine job. He could hardly be on time, and can only keep time if it is complete important and necessary. He does not come late because he forgets, but because he always find other attractions along the way. He likes to act opposite to what he wants to do. He is a very good speaker and make a very good politician. He can easily persuade other people and presented himself well in public, a real charmer. If he is a writer, he will write the best seller.

He is always searching for truth and constantly studys himself. He is never satisfied about his fame, his reputation or money, because he thinks he deserves more. He will keep searching even he is not sure what is his ultimate satisfaction.

Woman in love normally wants to feel secure and stable, but if you fall in love with this guy be prepare to be alone. He will come to see you when he feels like it. He won't even know how he spent his days everyday, so adjust yourself if you love him.

Dating him is like dating 2 guys, so today he can tell you how much he loves you, but tomorrow he might call you to cancel your date. When he upsets, he could tell you he hates your dress, even it is the same dress he used to tell you that makes you look very sexy. Do not ask him why he is being that way for he won't have any explanations too. When he is back to normal mood, he will take you out again and forget what just happened.

You can not expect him to be the same person now, and forever. His changes will depend on you, for better or for worst. If you like to take risk and dare for challenges, you will get along with him fine. He keeps his emotions secretly as if hiding it, so you will not be able to see if he is crazy in love with you, or does not give a damn at all, but be calm and patient.He will never leave you if he thinks you are a puzzle, then he will spent time solving this puzzle.

When Friendships Disintegrate

2007-01-04T22:22:00.000+08:00

It's funny why you will always appear offline when you see that I'm on, only to be visible when I'm gone. How do I know this? Cuz' I did the same thing too. I appeared offline and you immediately went back on. Ha ha ha.

Reuben, we've been friends since the primary school days. We climbed over the gates together, played pranks on people (more of you playing pranks on me ALL the time), we run around hiding from teachers so as to not get caught for staying back to play basketball. We did so many things together and had so much fun, and now you don't even want to talk to me just because our emotions got the better of us? I am not blaming you at all; who am I to say what's right when it comes to matters of the heart? I just want us to be friends again.

Sigh. I hate it when friends leave.
I hate it even more when I am the source of the problem.

Sleep Or The Lack Of It

2007-01-04T12:29:00.000+08:00

For many weeks, when every single day you slept at least half of it away, be prepared to be insomnia-stricken in the next few weeks.

Left Behind

2007-01-03T00:24:00.000+08:00

Why do I keep feeling that I am left behind?

I just really want to go to school with everybody else.

Sigh. So school's starting for everybody in 7 hours. Am I so jealous. Guess you only miss the things you used to do only after you aren't able to anymore. The times when my attendance can reach a record high of 22 days of absence in a term of 93 days, and now I am missing school like fuck. Not any school in particular; I just miss the feeling of waking up early to go to school and get some knowledge! At least life felt more promising then, at least I felt like I have a purpose in life. Now I don't even know where to go, what to do, what time to wake up. Every. Single. Day. I don't even feel like getting a job to earn some extra cash. It's sad that I am wasting my life away just like that.

Maybe I should make full use of this time to do the things I have always wanted, instead of what that is expected of me eg. getting a JOB.
1.Definitely the first on the list would be to learn how to play the guitar.
2.Get a (most likely borrowed) camera, and take photographs of every inch in Singapore.
3.Spend more time with my mama.
4.Go over to my grandmama's place at least 3 times per week to see my dearest lady and not missing Peng Peng's growth spurt.
5.Last but definitely not the least, treat my baby better and better with tender, loving care everyday.

Guess not going to school isn't such a bad thing after all.
Since I don't really mind you going to school at all, I shall have more faith in my boy, and you promised you will not betray my trust too. Hope you'll have a smashing time on the first day of school my dear boy!

Love

2007-01-01T21:49:00.000+08:00

With hands outstretched, I offer you the one key to my heart.

And the whole heart too.

For The Man In My Life

2007-01-01T03:32:00.000+08:00

Dearest Ernest,

Since you're the only one who knows of this new site of mine, I can openly declare my love for you! It's been a long time since I called you by your name, and love flows with it when I do. But still, I rather call you my baby boo. It makes me feel closer to you because I am the only one who can call you my lil' baby. Hee.

We've been together for four months and six days now. Doesn't seem like a long time, but it isn't a short period of time either. These four months with you have been the most exhilarating and wonderful time of my life. So wonderful, that sometimes there's really no words that I can find to show how much I appreciate you in my life, and how much I really love you. I've said it before, and I shall say it again. You have really changed me as a person, showing me that this world isn't such a sad place after all, because I know now that I've got you. Honestly, I don't know why I can actually be so happy, but you make me want to start believing again. In fact, now I am even believing in everlasting, tangible love. I can't see myself without you.

In this new year, we'll both be entering a new phase in our lives, going to new schools and meeting new people. I'd be lying if I say that I'm not afraid that you'll fall for someone better. And I really wish that would never happen. You told me that you feel the same way too, but baby, why would I ever give up on the best thing in my life? I don't think anyone else can ever make me feel the same way I do towards you right now. Nobody can replace you. Ever.

I want to be every little thing that you want, and make you feel like the happiest guy alive. Because you make me feel like I am the happiest girl in this whole, wide world whenever I'm with you. I can't love you enough. And I'm loving you more and more with each passing day.

With Love and Kisses,
Minyi

New Year's Eve

2006-12-31T22:31:00.000+08:00

Since I'm quite a superficial girl, I've decided to return back to Blogger because:
1.There are more Blogger skins available on the internet as compared to Livejournal.
2.I can post more things up using Blogger eg. MUSIC.
3.I know how to personalize my Blogger template, unlike Livejournal which is really a pain in the ass to even try.
4.Simply, I am just sick of my livejournal site.

I feel like I'm advertising for Blogger right now. Shouldn't I be paid and make the last day of the year feel like a dream for me? Damn, I want to go out! But baby's not free today and I can't really think of anyone else that I want to spend my New Year's eve with. I miss my boy. ):

Come to think of it, I change my site on this day every year. At least for the past 2 years. Maybe my #1 resolution should be stop being fickle, and stop being quite a pain in the ass for people. I wish to be a better person in the new year. Don't we all. But how many actually succeed and how many actually know how to? I guess I will never know how I can possibly be a better person in the new year, because I can't see myself in the third person, and nearly everyone around me is too nice (or just being hypocritical?) to me to tell me to change any habits or character traits that they don't like about me. Okay, I shall just stick to swearing less in 2007.

Baby, I miss u even though I'm talking to you on the phone right now. <3